Captioning

Part of my job is to caption programs.  Lately, I've only been doing some of our live programs..which I prefer.  You know they will start at the time they are scheduled...and end 30 or 60 minutes later (depending on which program it is).  Occasionally I have to caption a taped program...which is okay, depending on which program it is.  ha ha.  Sometimes we have to caption a program that is being filmed right then...but won't be on air until a later date.  Those are the ones that keep you away from your desk for much longer than what's scheduled.  Those tapings don't normally start on time, but you have to stay in the booth...because they could still start at any minute.  And we all know...that just as soon as I'd leave the caption booth....they'd decide they were ready to start. 

 The sound room...with the caption booth on the left.

Here's what captioning involves...  You get in the booth about 10 minutes til the time you're scheduled to start.  You have to open the caption software on the computer...make sure you've got the right in-house channel on the little TV... change the user profile to your own... save the blank template to the name and number of the program you're about to caption... call Master Control and run a test to make sure they can view the captioning on their screens.  Once you've done all that, you can sit back and wait for the program to start.  About 20 seconds before the program begins, you put the headphones on and when the 10-second countdown starts on the screen in front of you, you click the microphone on.

 Ready or not...

The actual captioning part is simple...in theory.  The people on tv say something... then you repeat it into the mic... and the computer software translates what you have just said, into text on the screen for all the world to see.  Yes.  In theory, that seems simple enough.  However...some people talk really fast...some people interrupt others who are talking... some people laugh a lot instead of talking... some people talk really slow and change their train of thought five times before they can complete one sentence.  Oh yes.  It's true.  :)  Try it sometime when you're watching tv.  In your head, try to repeat everything that is being said. 

The translation is something by itself.  Sometimes the computer translates very well and word for word what you have just said.  Sometimes...well, sometimes it most certainly does not.  That is what this blog is about today.  A collection of some of the funny things I've noticed in the past two years.  These are all things that I've had happen to me personally...where I've said one thing...and the computer threw something completely different up on the screen. 

Now...I should also state... Those who need and use the caption option on their televisions would not necessarily find any of these things amusing as they are trying to follow along on a program.  And in that respect, none of this is funny.  However, you have to admit...when you just see the right phrase and wrong phrase side by side like this....you have to laugh.  It's all I can do in the caption booth.  Once it's up on the screen, someone somewhere has seen it and it's too late to take it back.  And I don't care how much you "practice" with the software...it will always have something incorrect somewhere in the text.

Enjoy!


What I said -- What it was translated as

"Christian" -- "Russian"
"friendship" -- "French Ship"
"Gatlinburg" -- "cat on her"
"belonging to Jesus" -- "belonging to the cheeses"
"Oak Ridge Boys" -- "of your choice"
"Nashville" -- "kid filled"
"God will" -- "gobble"
"also" -- "all soap"
"rubberband" -- "to Iran"
"praise your Father" -- "crazy father"
"Pentecostal" -- "Picasso"
"everyone in the studio" -- "evidence tampering"
"Vikings attack they would climb up in the tower and pull ladder" -- "Vikings attack the root clump in the tower a full bladder"
"Angie" -- "like a banshee"
"was blind but now I see" -- "was blind but now spicy"
"Missouri" -- "misery"
"Oh Lord" -- "oak floors"
"giving away riches...it sounds like you shouldn't have riches at all" -- "giving away britches...it sounds like you shouldn't have britches at all"
"meet Jesus" -- "meats and cheeses"
"that's my buddy" -- "that's my bad knee"